Lifestyle & Belief

In honor of World Lion Day, a list of their top 30 complaints


A lion cubs explores its enclosure at Monarto Zoo on July 8, 2013 in Adelaide, Australia.


Morne de Klerk

Back in the day, lions had it made. They roamed freely across the Mediterranean, the Americas, the Middle East, Europe, Asia and Africa. They were the top of the food chain, the King of Beasts. They were in the Bible. 

You could say it's been relatively downhill since then.

There are two kinds of lions, African lions and Asiatic lions. In 1975 there was an estimated 250,000 lions in Africa. Today there are only about 30,000. Meanwhile, the Asiatic lion population stands at just 411. 

As many as 600 lions are killed every year by trophy hunters in Africa. Which hits especially hard when one of those hunters is a perky blonde cheerleader from Texas

And that's to say nothing about threats to lions posed by poaching, disease and habitat loss. It's extremely sad. Enough to make you want to stay in bed all day.

Enough to make you a real grouch.


Enough to make it so you just can't even hear one more PSA.

In honor of today being World Lion Day, here's a list of the King of Beasts' biggest beef:

1) I am exhausted

(Armin Weigel/AFP/Getty Images)

2) My paws are cold

(Sebastian Willnow/AFP/Getty Images)

3) I don't have opposable thumbs

(Jean-Francois Monier/AFP/Getty Images)

4) I said "rump kind!" I want the rump kind!

(Lex Van Lieshout/AFP/Getty Images)

5) I am a Jew.

(Andreas Solaro/AFP/Getty Images)

6) I said Jew!

(Karen Bleier/AFP/Getty Images)

7) What happened to parting this thing in my time of need?

(Karen Bleier/AFP/Getty Images)

8) I can't see

(Mohammed Abed/AFP/Getty Images)

9) Yeah, well my field of vision is severely restricted


10) Yeah, well some kid is literally sticking their finger in my mouth

(Rodrigo Arangua/AFP/Getty Images)

11) I wish I had that problem

(Attila Kisbenedek/AFP/Getty Images)

12) I wish I had either of your problems.

(Radek Mica/AFP/Getty Images)

13) I have this part down but how do you do that twerking bit?

(Radek Mica/AFP/Getty Images)

14) I feel like a fraud

(Valery Hache/AFP/Getty Images)

15) I feel like I walk and walk to stay in the same place

(Arno Burgi/AFP/Getty Images)

16) I just don't know like what I want to DO, or how I want to LIVE, y'know? There's like SO many decisions and I just want to BE.

(Morne de Klerk/AFP/Getty Images)

17) Ah! It's me! You're me!

(Attila Kisbenedek/AFP/Getty Images)

18) I want my mommy

(AFP/Getty Images)

19) OK, this one seems pretty valid

(Attila Kisbenedek/AFP/Getty Images)

20) I just want one precious minute without one of your little mouths pulling on my tail, rubbing up against my belly, jumping on my back, asking me questions.

(Dan Kitwood/AFP/Getty Images)

21) Dude, what was in those brownies?

(Lintao Zhang/AFP/Getty Images)

22) I don't know but I want another.

(Fabrice Coffrini/AFP/Getty Images)

23) What is even the point?

(AFP/Getty Images)

24) The point of what?

(John Moore/AFP/Getty Images)

25) ...


26) ?

(Yoshikazu Tsuno/AFP/Getty Images)

27) ...

(Radek Mica/AFP/Getty Images)

28) ...

(Jochen Luebke/AFP/Getty Images)

29) I've still got it! I've still got it!

(Patrik Stollarz/AFP/Getty Images)

30) Whatever you say, dear

(Pedro Armestre/AFP/Getty Images)