Putin: He does whatever he wants


Russia's President Vladimir Putin (R) presents Germany's Chancellor Angela Merkel with an old lithograph dedicated to the signing of a Russian-German trade agreement in 1894 at a press conference during an international economic forum in St. Petersburg, on June 21, 2013.



There is only one guy tougher than Chuck Norris, and Russian President Vladimir Putin thinks it's him.


1) When Putin goes horseback riding, he's the one who's bareback.

(Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/Getty Images)


2) When Putin flies, he is the plane.

(Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/GettyImages)


3) When Putin arm wrestles, he can win without even touching hands.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


4) When Putin says he wants to be one with the sea, someone encapsulates him in a glass ball and submerges him in the ocean.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


5) When Putin does judo, it's as if his opponents are 10 years old.

(Alexander Nikolayev/AFP/Getty Images)


6) When protesters shout "f*ck dictator" at Putin, he takes it as a compliment.

(Jochen Lübke/AFP/Getty Images)


7) When Putin gives a teddy bear as a gift, the little girl gives it right back.

(Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/Getty Images)


8) Putin's presence causes polar bears to lay down and die.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


9) When Putin isn't feeling well, he tells the doctor what's wrong.

(Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/Getty Images)


10) When Putin hangs out with Steven Seagal, he doesn't even need to look behind him to know Seagal's there.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


11) When Putin walks with monks, he is the middle path.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


12) When Putin goes to a meeting, he crosses a river in a single bound.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


13) When Putin goes fishing, he does so in formal wear.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


14) Putin can, with his mind, resist becoming cryogenically frozen.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


15) When Putin plays with dogs, they ask him if he wants his belly scratched.

(Alexey Druginyn/AFP/Getty Images)


16) Putin puts on his shades, so the sun knows to come out.

(Dmitry Kostyukov/AFP/Getty Images)


17) Putin thinks about getting out of the car, so the cardoor knows to open.

(Ronny Hartmann/AFP/Getty Images)


18) When Putin plays hockey, he doesn't even need teammates.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/GettyImages)


19) When Putin goes swimming, he gets the water wet.

(Alexey Druzhinin/AFP/Getty Images)


20) Putin looks at a map, so the country knows where he is.

(Dmitry Astakhov/AFP/Getty Images)


21) When Putin goes hunting, the animals are just glad he stopped by.

(Dmitry Astakhov/AFP/Getty Images)


22) Pans are only round because Putin chose that shape to mould them into.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


23) When Putin flies in a helicopter, he shows the pilot where to go.

(Alexei Nikolsky/AFP/Getty Images)


24) When Putin goes to light the Olympic flame, he does so on a unicorn. Through space.

Photo Illustration. GlobalPost/Getty Images

Related Stories