“I won’t eat it unless it’s Indianized”

The World

Just when you thought it was safe to watch cricket, India decides to adopt the lowly hot dog.  Don't get me wrong, I stood up for the import of cheerleaders for the first round of the Indian Premier League, and I got behind the MLB's move to recruit Indian pitchers and the NBA's ongoing talent search.  But I have to draw the line when a hot dog becomes, as the WashPost's Emily Wax describes, "a mushy, green log of spicy potatoes, soybeans, peas, garlic, peppers and onions held together by a fat hot-dog bun and topped with raw onions and thick mayo chutney."  

McDonald's can serve its Chicken Maharaja Mac (no two all-beef patties here), add a McVeggie and scrap the breakfast sausage (no pork, either).  But certain things should be sacrosanct.  I am a vegetarian 9 out of 10 meals, but a mushy green log?  No, I say, no.

But the funniest thing about Wax's article — which apart from the green log masquerading as a hot dog discusses the Cinnabon craze and the advent of Weber Grills (they offer "experience centers" and "license to grill" tutorials) — has to be the fact that one of my best desi friends is so deep in the sweet spot of this new marketing trend that he actually mentioned all of these items to me in the same drinking one-night-only drinking fest last week.  (Yes, we discussed whether I can carry-on a Weber Grill to evade the Indian mark-up)

Among the gems: "Probably because you got enough of them when you were a kid, you've had enough of hot dogs.  But I think that's why I can't stop eating them.  I go down to Khan Market and pick up three or four for lunch every week."….  

I had never thought of it that way, but maybe he's right.  Maybe everybody has a certain number of hot dogs he or she has to eat before it's over.  But the big quandary is, does that come before or after the diet of mushy green logs?

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